Somethings stirring

Suddenly, life’s pace quickened quite a big deal for me. Every week is packed with some stuff to be done. And during days that I find myself exceptionally free and brain-dead, I kinda worry. Coz it probably means there’s things which is not done yet.

Such is the slowly retarding brains of a 27 yr old. Sigh, life’s barely beginning Suet. Please get your brains to wake up! LOL!

I was thinking as I am now busying myself with the wedding preps, I have got tons of plans for after wedding!! I wanna go take up photography classes. Like, really seriously learn how to use that machine I have at home. I wanna take up cooking classes as well! I was looking at this cooking school and their food sounds good. But I am a picky eater, I don’t take beef or mutton, or dairy products or most type of mushrooms… -sigh- perhaps I should start learning from my mum or my mum-in-law. haha!

Such are plans I have! Lets get them executed one day!

Dum Dee Dee

I bored shitless these days. Or should I really be ‘full of shit’ these days?

- Sigh – pathetic me is suffering from constipation. Fruitless toilet trips. I bet 2 kg of my weight accounts towards the waste materials storing up in my intestines and they better get the hell out of my ass. My usual tummy has now swell to resemble a 3 months pregnant lady… how embarassing…

My apologies if I had sounded crude and disgusting. You ain’t hearing nothing yet really. My best friend from poly and I used to disgust such ‘waste matters’ over the dining table in a matter of fact manner, and it didn’t spoit our appetite. Although I can’t say the same for the other friends who share the table with us… Err… why am I sharing such a gross side of me? lol!

Anyway, some of you probably has seen a really gross and funny side of me. Some of you probably will never see it. As we grow older, we’ve got to learn to be shy. Especially on the social platform. Damn social etiquette. They made me so fake. haha! Actually I don’t even know which is the real me. The shy one or the shameless one. haha!

I realised wordpress’ interface has just gotten a little depressing. I am not sure if its wordpress or its my mac. well, ok lets just say its my mac. Does that warrant me to upgrade to the new 17″ MacBook? Or maybe the 20″ iMac? plleeeeasee… They are looking smokin’ hot!! But I am really just joking. I am really happy with my current 13″. Its handy and I really just surfs the net with it.

Work Life balance to me is still myth. But I aim to make it come true soon. Starting work at this co has been really great. People are great. Whats not to like, when your colleague keep harping on the fact that you are pretty? hahah! On a serious note, thats really just the prelude to telling you, there’s work he needs you to do. haha! But its ok, as long I am pretty. haha! *bimbo! Work has been hectic, with lotsa housekeeping to be done. But it seems kinda impossible, becuase there’s no breathing space for me to do housekeeping. Since there’s no chance to upkeep the house, lets just burn the house down? kekeke!

I have just survived my first one month at work. And it felt like 6 months has flashed passed. Now… does it mean, I felt like I am so familiar with my work already or does it really mean, I feel six months older in the duration of one? haha

Suety’s thoughts are messed up tonight. Sharon’s at UK till 2nd week of May. She hasn’t met her girlfriends for the longest time. She misses her them. She need to get in touch with EArth… There’s a sense of insecurity when you feel that you have flew too far away from the familiarity the Earth for the distant strange skies. She needs to feel her feet unite with the stability of the ground. It gives a strange sense of comfort.

Last Saturday, Suet went a friend’s housewarming party. It felt strange. Strange becuase the few months gap has made her felt so awkward with her friends. She is mentally tired, she can’t focus much on the conversations and her mind seems incapable to retain information for long. Thats bad news really.

I guess, Suet needs to get rested. Probably get something to nourish her weak brains. LOL! Good night everyone. Thanks for staying tune!

Redefining My Path

How was the IT show over the weekends? It was madness! The craziest thing of it all, was dearest Suety was there for all 4 days! She went through the maddening crowd four times over, as if she loved swimming in the sea of human beings.

But luckily, it was for good reason. On Day One, she has not planned to go there. But since she had dinner at Marina Square, might as well ‘drop by’ and see what good stuff there are in the IT show. On Day Two, she was there to get research materials – grabbing all brochures she can find to compare specs and prices. On Day Three, she was all ready to grab all that she has planned to grab! But time was too tight, therefore on Day Four, she has to make an extra trip there to settle the final item.

So loot items consist of 1) Dell 17″ laptop at $1,700; 2) Canon Digital IXUS 80 IS at $319; 3) SingNet Mobile Broadband for $xx (I totally have no idea how much was paid, coz it wasn’t me who paid!!); 4) Canon Pixma MX700 Printer; 5) Free dining vouchers at Fish and Co; 6) A whole lot of freebies from Canon.

Seriously, I didn’t pay for all the items there, but I did queue up to get them! And dammit, I realised none of the items are for myself!! WTH!! (I hereby declare myself insane!) The queuing process has been so exhausting. You practically queue to get the goods, queue to pay for the goods, queue to get from level 1 to level 2 to level 3 to level 4 and then to level 6. Recession? Who says there’s recession? Singaporeans just need a good reason/excuse/sale to get the cash out of their wallets!

***
A good news to share, everybody.

Suety’s job hunt is over! Got a job in a small local co, doing admistrative duties. Today is my first day.

It all started with a very embarassing interview session. The interviewer offered me a handshake. As I was reaching out to shake his hands and standing up from the sofa, my heels got caught on the carpet and I almost fell flat back on the sofa! Luckily the handshake saved me from further disgrace.

But the interview went well also because the bosses were really friendly. They were warm and not intimidating. So I guess it was easier to speak in that kind of situation.

The first day has been great! Lots to catch up in terms of system, processes and procedures. I hope I get the hang of it soon. The first few days of work at anywhere usually make me feel like I am an old fart – terrible slow in catching the flow, blur, bountiful errors and utterly useless. But so far, I sure hope I catch up well. Its the first day after all, right?

So hell yea, I am employed and I am counting down to pay day!

p/s: I realise I don’t know when’s pay day! LOL!

Its already March, huh?

So time flies. We usually say this when we have accomplished too little for a particular timeframe. Its already March, darlings! Whats your plans for the Summer season of 2009? Its still raining sometimes and scorching hot at other days. So I guess its important to have some rainy day plans even if you’ve scheduled for a sun-tanning session.

So whats Suety up these days? nothing much really. well, my blog sorta explains it right? Although there were days when some really intriguing thoughts fill my head when I was ’stoned’ at the cafe waiting for time to pass. But alas, when great thoughts fill my head, I am always lacking my laptop or my notepad. So I think the Nobel Prize is destined to elude me. LOL!

I’ve been quite a homebody of late. Finally completed my assignment at Tuas. So no more Tuas for me! Yeay! Although this really means a total lacking of income for me, I was glad to say goodbye to Tuas. I will miss the people there for sure, but I think thats about it. Sad huh.

My mum was going about saying that people these days are pampered. We are really choosy these days because we are not desperate enough. and blah blah blah .. – Well, she is really hinting something la! hahah! But well, I think there’s much more to her superficial theory. Decision making is sometimes not as straightforward as that. But then I can’t deny, sometimes it is really shitty because IT IS AS STRAIGHTFORWARD as that… So I can only count my lucky stars and pray hard the heavenly ones to shower more blessings unto me. Well, lucky stars are needed, becuase I believe if there’s a hotline 1800-Heaven, its gonna be damn hot! especially after the collapse of Lehman.

So its gonna be Monday tomorrow. Lets all hope for more good news to come!!

Seemed like a long time

When I logged on today, it felt like it has been a long time since I last updated my blog.

Life has been mundane punctuated with moments which provoke my thoughts and moments which induced panic attacks. OK, the headlines for my life so far:

i) The weather is showing some change. It is getting warmer these days. my palms were sticky from perspiring the whole day today. Is this psychological or is it really hot?

ii) My bridal studio is calling it a day and you can read more of it here. Its funny that I should be more panicky than I am now, but I am perfectly calm. Still waiting and see what happens.

iii) Job market has been really dire. I don’t usually buy Business Times, but when I picked up the weekend edition, the headlines screamed, “Starry Eyed In A Job Desert”. Kinda feeling some pressure weighing me down now.

iv) Photography is a sort of philosophy and subtle self-reflection. When you feel good, every sight and sound is so beautiful. I took my camera out for a tour that day, and my mood swing resulted in unspectacular pictures. *waste time*

v) My sister’s pregnant. *Poppers!* But I soon realised behind the celebratory moments we see, is a lifetime of thoughts, considerations, anxieties and sacrifices. But the joy that we get out of it is what makes life worth living – for the parent and child.

vi) My parents are selling my childhood home in KL. It has been quite a hustle as the administeration differs from that in Singapore. Can’t really bear it, but in the midst of everything, I grew to realise how wonderful Singapore really is and fortunate her people are.

So, all this being said, life is still good for me. Simple things ignites thoughts and make me reflect upon life, which is good really. To see things deep and not just at a superficial level. But then again, I really shouldn’t allow such slow pace of life slow me down. Time to do something really constructive – and its overdue!

On the Fourth Day of Christmas…

Christmas has been an extraordinary affair this year. Lots of parties, cooking, washing and it has been truly exhausting. But I am loving it.

I guess it felt almost weird that i had no photos taken for all the parties except for the one with my ex-colleagues.

As it is the first christmas we are spending at my new place, we had quite a few ‘open house’. It kicked off with Darren’s paternal relatives coming to our place on the 13th December, then my family came over for dinner on the 14th Dec, Darren’s maternal relatives came on the 25th and my ex-classmates came on the 26th. Lots of cooking and washing. Mostly I helped with preparing the veggies and washing up as I am still a very inexperienced cook.

However, I had my virgin attempt to whip out a meal on the 26th Dec when my classmates came over. It was a real “storm” in the kitchen, with a blur chef taking reign.. It was a disaster brewing. LOL! I cooked pasta (chilli crab sauce and seafood tomato sauce), mashed potatoes, potato soup… errrmmm.. thats about it! LOL! Well, I guess only the soup manage to salvage a little of my reputation. haha!

Cooking was a very interesting experience. From budgeting how much food u need, to getting the necessary ingredients, to washing and learning to cook them right. I was lost from time to time, because I had to rely on my ‘gut feel’. Lets see if my second attempt would result in a more scrumptious meal yea!

Tomorrow’s gonna be the fourth day of Christmas. Where will you be? What will you be doing? No matter what, no matter where, wishing you guys Merry Christmas and enjoy the final countdown to 2009. Seek forgiveness for any wrongdoings in 2008, renew friendships old and new, make amends if you must… anyway we have got another 3 days before 2009. Not a lot of time, but enough to make some significant difference. Good Luck!

Pool of Puddles

As a child, I loved going out in the rain, playing in the rain despite being told not to; stamp my feet on puddles so that it create splashes, and i especially love it when I know the splashes will irritate my friends.

Such senseless act, yet I derived so much joy out of it.

These days, I am getting less hardy. I don’t go out in the rain anymore because my handphones will get wet, becuase I hate the feeling of wet clothes clinging on to me, and becuase its utterly cold when i step into any air-conditioned places. But sometimes I can’t help it and needs to run in the rain especially when i am in a rush.

The rainy weather is usually used metaphorically to describe melancholia and tears, or cleansing and hope. Two very different different moods yet they are linked as a ‘before and after’ phenomenon. When the rain first started to fall, its akin to flood gates which were just opened. Furious and full of despair, hopeless and neverending. However after some time, when the rain starts to lighten, it is like tears which are starting to dry. Calmness reign and hope starts to fill where emptiness had been.

Well, thats probably an adult’s thoughts. For a kid, be it rain or shine, it probably means fun – although both in a different way.

Splashing Puddles

***

December is a month of wind and rain. I really look forward to the fragrance of blooms and warm sunshine soon.

Cannonball

Cannonball – by Damien Rice.

A really nice song which i will never get tired of.

The lyrics are simple enough, yet the meaning seems pretty deep.

stones taught me to fly
love, it taught me to lie
life, it taught me to die
so it’s not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball

Oh what irony!

Enjoy!

Transformers and James Bond

Location: Tuas

Tuas is a quaint little park (as in industrial park) bustling with life. There’s hardly a quiet moment here. Lorry, trucks, pickups, trailers – very common sight here. I reckon this is the place to be, if you are in love with childhood cartoons like ‘Transformers’. Robots in disguise really. LOL! Don’t mind this place for its dusty appearance, its a kind of self-defence mechanism for the ‘robots’ really. Cuz sometimes this big boys run along side too close to each other, they need to spread some dust to warn others of their presence. And unlike animals, spreading dust is not a way to ‘camouflouge’ themselves. Transformers are really ‘robots in disguise’ remember, so they are already camouflouged!

Some people might wonder why there’s so little good food around here. Hmm… If you think about it, I think its becuase robots don’t eat? They only need to oil their joints once a while, get some parts replaces every now and then. So food is not very necessary.

Transformers - Bumblebee!

Aston Martin

Although there are big boys here all over, there are some really nice handsome boys around. Like just some distance from my office is the Aston Martin showroom. Hmmm.. such an ‘atas’ car name in the midst of the big boys park yea. That shows that James Bond is indeed a man with good taste and he needs to shop in privacy. This is the place where no one knows he is 007.

He can also do a test drive here, which is really much more challenging than doing one in the mountainside (you know those picturesque scenes you see in the movies?). He can not only compete with the ‘robots in disguise’, he can test the braking system by speeding at 100km/h for a distance of 500m, and then jam brake!! Oooh, thats so cool! And once again, he proved that food centres are not a necessity, because driving in such style really does not go well with having a scrumptious meal. It will all go to waste, whether you eat before or after you drive.

***

Such wild imagination I have. Seriously once I reached Tuas, its not so much of an issue. I can get down to work. But the journey here is a killer. It saps all energy I have slowly. By the time the train reach Boon Lay, I am a dead duck. My eyes will be so dry, my body so tired and my mind so dead. Oh, I tried reading some materials on the train but I always end up feeling nauseas at the end of the journey.

But here I am. Had my breakfast, stretched myself awake, and the boss is away!! yeah hoo! So perked up for work now.

Sunshine After The Rain

I am still waiting, for the sun to start shining after raining for the longest time.

Yeah, the rain has stopped finally. And my mum got to hang out her laundry finally. Know what, I think in time to come, having our laundry sun-dried is such a luxury. Because we will be working in the day, and our laundry are most likely to be moon-dried. I will miss the crisp aroma of the sun-baked clothes.

Anyway, me being jobless has led to quite a bit of ‘repercussions’. I begin to realise being a housewife is not an option to me really, coz I will be staying with my in-laws. And as the old proverb goes, “Two tigers cannot hide in one mountain”. I think it will be the beginning of a long long saga if I really become a housewife. But I really do yearn to be a stay-home mum one day when I have kids. I’d really love to watch them grow and grow with them. I want them to know I am their mum, and not Maria! Will I be able to make that dream come true?

My mum has started ‘preparing’ me to be a good daughter in law, like getting me to cook the rice, mop the floor, etc. Sigh – I think she just find me being too idle at home. I am beginning to feel stressed staying at home. keke!

Then I think having too much free time on hand, seems to make everyone panic for me. Think the market is just pretty bad now, and seeing people idling away is such an eyesore. Weird questions people asks me, like I love being jobless. Maybe I am not working hard enough in my job search. But I promise I will work hard. Coz the people around me is making me feel the heat. And suddenly it really feels more normal to be employed. Like no matter whats the pay, whats the job, just make sure u are at work during 9am to 5pm. But i am a choosy fellow, I just can’t settle for ANY jobs. LOL!

The last thing why I really hope to land myself in a job soon is becuase I do worry at times that people might start to think that I am sponging on my husband, sucking his poor little piggy bank dry. Though, seriously whats wrong with that? -duh!- Not like my husband’s complaining, and I do wish to lighten his burden soon. If not we will keep going into deficit, because I tend to eat a lot la. haha!

Sigh. I am getting paranoid. My phone is getting too quiet for my own comfort. Sometimes I checked so many times, just because i thought it vibrated. And at times, I relaly thought of sending it for servicing, just in case its spoilt and people can’t get through. But there are always pple calling in to help me test my phone and see if its working – the salespeople. Calling to ask me to buy credit card la, etc etc. OMG.

I need to get a life man. Even if I don’t know when the sun’s gonna shine. But I guess I can try to be productive in other ways. Its barely one month after my exams, and it feels like a year. wth.